I'm feeling fed up - anyone fancy an argument?

I don't mind what we argue about, anything you like, I am sure I can find an opposing opinion. C'mon I fancy a right old dust -up , put'em'up!

No, sod off.  What you gonna do about it?

Southerners can't play golf

That's not gonna start an argument Tim, it's a statement of fact. 

Try golf attire that usually gets a response.

I can think of a better one, Gary, but I have been banned from using the word ever again on this forum.

Golf attire is tame after what I witnessed last week-end.

ok here goes .................. anyone with a handicap higher than mine shouldnt be allowed on a golf course.......BANDITS !!!  lol

We take stroke but not distance and take a drop somewhere close to where we think the ball got lost.  That makes you a dirty cheat Dave.  Also we allow one mulligan per nine holes (no carryovers allowed). 

Anyone got a problem with that?

You calling me a big girl JP?  I've officially not been a girl for five years now and the scars have all healed. 

Not forgetting his sister 'Brooke' who drinks lots of tea.

See anything of your posh cousin, Premium?

He had a car accident in Spain and had to rely on his uncle Bail to get him out of nick.

Geek.

Star Trek is much better. 

I can just imagine you now Dave. 

National health glasses with thick lenses and tape on the bridge, greasy side parting, tank top knitted by your mum (who you still live with) over your paisley shirt, beige trousers pulled up so high your nipples are kept warm and your ankles are cold, comfortable brougues from Clarks, notepad and pen (in case you see an interesting train or bus), tartan patterned thermos, a snort when you laugh and a copy of Spiderman #100 as your prized possession (in mint condition, kept in a plastic sleeve in an airtight tupperware box under your bed, never read and only touched whilst wearing the same gloves that snooker referees wear). 

Altogether now, to the tune of "She'll be coming round the mountain": -

Oh, and when you meet up with your chums, you talk to each other in Klingon

Take care David, he is a lot younger than you.

Your bragging about a birdie and then mention a putt..

Good grief man......Don't you know how to hole from the fairway...

Hey David - these is only one wind up merchant on here.......me...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After a great day in grantham and a week off work I am now back on line and raring to go......so watch ya selves....

Robert happens to be my Sunday name..

Robbie does have a famous strain to it but only the "ie"

Perhaps I should revert to my hero's name  "chuckie"

Never thought myself to be scarey...

Didn't mean to frighten you ...

Don't be scared...

Not many Mark..the odd one perhaps..

Much prefer cuddly stuff myself to that frightening gear..

So when did you first realise your fear issue..? Spill all, we are friends here and can help.

And if you prefer lay down on the couch close eye's and go back as far as possible - the insecurities of a one eyed teddy or something similar in childhood often lights the spark in these issues..

So come now, please tell....

But you must feel better now for getting the blouse thing off your chest...

Oh I just love a happy ending....